Reapplying to Medicine, Do or Don't

If I'm answering honestly, the answer I've been leaning towards most recently is the latter. It's not that I don't want to be a doctor anymore, I really do. But it's not the only thing that I want to do with my life. That's not in terms of a career, medicine I'm still entirely set on, if a career was all that I wanted my life to be about.

The reality I'm faced with now is that I'm 22, and the earliest that I could possibly do medicine if all went right is 23. Add on top of that 4 years of medical school and 2 foundation years, and suddenly I'm not trained until I'm in my late twenties. Whilst this is happening all of my friends are settling down, earning money, getting a mortgage and generally just starting their lives. It feels a lot like I would be postponing life in order to pursue something in which every stage is so challenging.

So this was my thought process until Tuesday. So why was Tuesday different? Well I went to the anatomy lab of the medical school, and that changed things. It served as a reminder of what I could have if I continued to work hard at it, if I continued to make sacrifices for it, and it's amazing. It's the only thing I've ever really wanted to do, and I know I can be introverted, but when I'm so passionate about something, I'd put my everything into it, which is why I'd make a good doctor. I'd put everything I am into it, all I would need is the opportunity.

So in honesty, I'm still torn. How do you choose between your career aims and the aims for your personal life? I always used to think everything was so black and white, either you wanted something or you didn't. But this is pretty speckled with areas of grey.

So my plan for now: work insanely hard for the next few weeks and then enjoy my summer. I've spent 3 years doing my undergraduate degree, and worked insanely hard, I need a break. After this, when I have to leave Brighton, I'm going to decide if I'm going to reapply to medicine next year ad put myself though the process again, or I'd change my aims and go for medical research - my second choice.

Wish me luck in obtaining clarity!!

XOX 

How to cope if you don't get into Medical School

I'm writing this blog now, and then I'll post it when I feel like I'm ready to talk about it to people. But I didn't get into med school this year. I know that it's insanely competitive, and I did really well to get to the interview stage, but it's still pretty gutting to get this far only to fall at the last hurdle (In terms of admissions anyway).

So what are my thoughts:

I think they're pretty normal things to think when you're in this situation!

1. 'Can I handle going through this kind of rejection again?' 
It's a massive thing when you aim for your dream only to get told that you can't do it right now, I mean it's really-soul destroying. Things in life don't always go the way you would have hoped for, and sometimes there are massive hurdles, disappointments and moments when you just want to give up, but I think this is part of what makes us human. The important thing is how you react to it. So the answer to the above question is yes. I can handle this. Why? Because I've already handled it before And it's for what I really want, and if I get there all of the disappointment, feeling rejected generally rubbish, and most importantly all of the hard work would have been so worth it. I think it's also important to learn from this situation. Work out the instances in which your application was weak, and improve it - get that extra work experience, improve those interview skills, completely destroy the UKCAT, whatever it takes.

2. 'Am I certain this is really what I want to do?'
Going through this kind of situation really separates applicants with this question. Is it what I want? If you're thinking 'oh well, I'll become a scientist, musician, counsellor, literary genius instead' without much thought or disappointment, then the answer is probably no, and to go and pursue another career path. But if you do what I did and stare at the final rejection email thinking 'but the only thing I want to do is this' then it's probably a good idea to persevere. If you think you'd be just as happy in another career path, that one would probably be easier to pursue!

3. 'What if everyone is disappointed in me?'
Let them be disappointed! The likelihood is that they won't be, medicine is an incredibly hard course to get onto, and many great doctors didn't get in on their first attempt. In all honestly, if you're good enough to even be considered as a potential medical student, then you've done pretty well for yourself.

4. 'What do I do now?'
Now the best situation would be to pursue something that would beef up your application next time around. My personal plan is to hopefully do a masters degree, explore an area of medicine that interests me and also continue setting up a life I could have if I theoretically never got into medicine. This would make me more favourable academically, as well as freeing me up some time to increase the amount of voluntary work on my personal statement which would be great. I think this is a really good plan, however it's not for everyone, so do what you need to do - get a job (medical or not, either can be used to increase skills you'd use as a doctor), go travelling - enriched life experiences look great on a personal statement, especially doing what I did and working in a hospital abroad. The experience is absolutely amazing and I would seriously recommend it to anyone. I went to Thailand with Gap Medics who were particularly good - I'll put a link at the end of this post.

The most important things I can leave you with is to stay positive but be realistic. This isn't a never, it's a not right now, people start medical school at such a variety of ages so not getting in one year isn't catastrophic. It's important to use it as an opportunity to improve yourself and your application for next time, rather than 'you're not good enough'. However it's also important to be prepared, the application process is a difficult start of a long and difficult journey, and it requires commitment and resilience, ironically qualities of good doctors.

Congratulations to everyone who got a place this year and good luck to those (re)applying next year!

XOX

Check them out!  http://www.gapmedics.co.uk/

Blood!

Yesterday I took the opportunity to do something that I've been meaning to do for an insanely long time. I'm not going to go into a whole essay about it, but it's an absolutely amazing thing to do. Something that is much simpler and less frightening/stressful than I was imagining, and it saves lives. I was reading yesterday that 25% of us will require a transplant at some point! yet a shockingly small amount of people actually donate blood.

They have stock levels, and although my particular blood type wasn't one of the most sought after it still has a massive impact. Plus the pain and resultant wound is really insignificant. I'm terrified of needles but I just found the whole process fascinating. I'd definitely recommend the experience as something everyone should consider. It's amazing how something so small can be so important! Plus I've felt amazing since the donation, i know some people feel faint, and I expected this, but I felt so great! 

Www.blood.co.uk has more information! 

XOX

Interview Response 1: Rejected

I got a response back from the first university I was interviewed for recently, and as I expected it was a no. I can't really say that I'm surprised. I've always come across really well on paper, but when it comes to an interview situation I get really nervous. I can't keep my cool so I forget a lot and don't talk about things I really should or think as coherently as would usually be required of me. Especially when I know exactly what my performance at interview is riding on. I did the same as I did when I got rejected from Kings, and didn't even want to look at my track status. But this time I actually told people, who are amazing and made me feel so much better about the situation. 

I'm feeling a little gutted, but I'm really glad I still have a chance at getting in this year. Currently I'm being considered by two different universities. I've done really well to get to this stage, as competitive as medicine is, it just feels so close that I can almost grasp it, but I'm not quite there. Hopefully one of the other universities will like me enough to offer me a place, but if not I will bulk put my application with more work experience, study for another year and hopefully get myself a masters degree and reapply, working hard on my timekeeping for the UKCAT. 

But for now it's getting close to Easter break, and I have three deadlines to meet before I can get there, and with my dissertation write up due just after, I have a lot of work on my hands. 

Here's to a busy couple of months,

XOX 

Update: March 2014

I haven't blogged for a while, so here's just a short update on how I've been. A good starting place would be to discuss how I got on at the selection centre at Warwick. Well this, despite being nothing at alike I'd imagined, actually wasn't too bad. It seemed like a mix of my Imperial interview, my 'Asda Magic' session and an exam all rolled into one. This sounds absolutely horrendous, but I actually relaxed quite a lot during the session and I think this was a result of doing it as a group. It was interesting to see other prospective medical students and realise that, very much like myself, they haven't actually got it all together and have similar concerns to myself. We're basically all trying our hardest and hoping that somewhere likes us enough to offer us a place. Which is exactly how it works when you go for an insanely competitive course. My interview was for both Warwick and Barts, but I absolutely loved Warwick university. It's a campus, something I completely despised the idea of when I came to Brighton, but seems much more appealing now. I love living in the middle of a city, and I know that I'd absolutely love living in London too, but something appeals about the sense of community there. I guess we'll see if I get an offer!

I think I blogged a lot at the end of last year about how unhappy I was as well. I think it's safe to say that things have changed here, for the better. I promised myself that 2014 was going to be the year that I would be happy, and despite a slightly rocky start, being insanely busy and recovering from the carnage that was 2013, we're a quarter of the way through and I'm  happier than I've been in a really long time, meaning I'm more optimistic and having a much more positive outlook on things. I've stressed about exams of course, and the future, but I feel so much more myself. I'm doing things that I actually just forgot that I do when I'm happy. Like singing around the house (not just in the shower), humming as I cook, smiling at strangers in the street and dancing around the kitchen (you get the idea!). I can actually honestly say I'm content, it's been a while.

Finally I finished my first semester of my final year, and despite not doing quite as well as I'd hoped, I've done okay. My exams were okay. In comparision to the average, I've done pretty damn well, but semester one exams really aren't my best part, so I'm glad my courseworks this year have been pretty good as well. I'm averaging a first overall so I'm off to a great start to try and get my 2:1 at the end of it. But with 3 deadlines in the next few weeks I'm definitely feeling the pressure! It's slightly scary to think in 3 months time I'll be done.

Wish me luck!

XOX

The End of The First Round: Shortlist to Interview

For the universities I've applied for at least, shortlisting for interview is complete. I think it's good to reflect back on the process and learn from what has gone well and what hasn't.

Firstly, I think it's okay to be immensely proud of myself in surviving this stage. So many people, some amazing applicants fall at this hurdle, and I was almost convinced that I would be one of them, so now I would be picking up the pieces and prepping myself for a 2015 entry application cycle. I'm not at this stage yet.

So far I've had 1 rejection, from King's College, London. If I'm completely honest with myself, this was one of my favourites, so I was a little bit gutted to hear this (you can read about this in my post: 'Rejection'). But they were very clear with me, so I completely understand their reasoning. My UKCAT wasn't quite high enough, so I didn't get in based on my mini-panic attack in the exam, causing me to screw up my quantitative reasoning section and miss out 13 questions. But these things happen, and despite this, I'm still doing well.

I had an interview in November at Imperial College, London. I love Imperial as a university, and it's always been one of my favourites. The university has such good standing, and the course looks absolutely fantastic, and completely in tune with my method of learning. The interview itself was strange, and looking back at it now, I wasn't entirely prepared, which is majorly because I didn't really know what to expect. I think some questions I answered really well, others I got flustered and could have answered much better (the kind of answers you consider half an hour later whilst sitting on the tube!). So I guess my standing in comparison to the other applicants will determine if I get made an offer of a place. I should find this out within the next month, which is both incredibly frightening, but also exciting.

Last week, I got an email notifying me I had been shortlisted for interview for the graduate scheme at the university of Warwick. Warwick also looks absolutely amazing, the campus looks so pretty, and the fact that the scheme is entirely for graduates is really appealing. The selection process is a selection day, completely opposite to my experience at Imperial, however I'm hoping the competitive side of me will come out enough for me to appear charismatic, without seeming too overbearing. I have longer to prepare, therefore after my exam, I'll have time to properly research the process and mentally prepare myself for the process, to give myself the best possible chance.

So the day I found this out was absolutely amazing, so to add to my excitement, I got an email from Barts and the London, informing me that they were also considering my application, based on my performance at the selection centre at Warwick. This is amazing. For those who know the medical school selection procedure, Barts and Warwick work together to select candidates to offer places to, however, you only get considered by both, if you are shortlisted by both.

From going from being convinced that I wasn't good enough, 3 of the best universities, and 75% of my choices, have disagreed with me enough to want to take me further. This is really exciting.

The next stage is the interview stage. I'll keep you updated as I go along, and hopefully I'll make it past this stage!

XOX

'Invitation to Selection Centre'

These keep coming when I'm in public places :D
The rise of modern technology means that you can check your emails anywhere, and I very much struggled to keep it cool when reading this over my lunch today.

Yes, I have a second interview, which is amazing, because despite myself not think I'm good enough or that I've done enough to get into medicine, not one but 2 medical schools think differently enough to take my application to the next stage. This is absolutely fantastic. I'm trying not to get really excited, but my dream is feeling closer than ever, and I'm really happy about it. I have a bit more time to prepare this time too. I have over a month until the date so I'm feeling much more relaxed about it than the one I had before. It's a completely different situation this time, I have to go to a selection centre, rather than just sit in front of a panel and talk. This has good and bad points. I always dread these kind of interviews, I hate the not knowing what to expect. However, taking what I can from the group interview I had for my job, seeing my 'competition' motivates me to really try hard to show the assessors my worth. I'm hoping this is what will happen this time. I'm also feeling more confident based on the fact that I've already had an interview, I know a little bit more about what to expect, and I can draw from what went well and what didn't go quite as well to really tailor my performance this time. I'm in a pretty good position.

Anyway, before I can even stress about this, I have exams to pass!

Busy, busy month!

XOX